Unfortunately, and as sad as it sounds, some people leave a relationship hanging in the air. They might ghost you, go silent, disappear, withhold a clear answer, or simply wait for you to end it yourself. Often, this behavior reflects their own unresolved issues, an absence of true self-awareness, a lack of courage and responsibility, and an inability to handle confrontation—choosing to avoid it at all costs.
Recognizing this doesn’t excuse their actions, but it can help you detach from taking it to the heart: it is not about you – it is about them!
Now, if you find yourself waiting endlessly for them to act, hoping to hear from them, or stuck in the grey area of “let’s stay in touch,” “my circumstances might change,” or other vague excuses designed to keep you hanging, recognize this for what it is. And if they simply disappear or leave the door slightly open, it’s on you to take matters into your own hands and close that door.
You owe it to yourself. Yes, it takes time to process. It takes courage, calmness, and a high level of self-awareness to act from a place of strength and stability. But trust me—you know deep down, no matter how you feel about them right now, that you deserve better. We all do. Your feelings, energy, time, and thoughts now deserve to be directed toward healing, learning, and moving on.
How to take matters into your hands?
Give yourself a deadline, that you will not wait for as long as it takes, you are the person to decide, but do not make it long, as the more you wait, the more anger you feel.
Try to reach out and talk – if it is doable – and have that difficult talk in which you can have a closure or clarity.
If you can’t get hold of that person, visualize closing the door on that relationship. Do it for yourself and no one else.
Write a letter on a piece of paper, and say everything you want to say, then burn it, and let the ashes fly in the air.
Now what’s next?
You might be in a position of waiting and imagining a grand gesture to win you back. I hear you and we all have been there, you can close your eyes, place both hands on your heart and breath long slow breaths, when you feel silence inside your mind, listen to your heart, what does your heart tell you?
Your higher-self, that authentic true voice inside of you – that we tend to silence so many times – is the truth, your truth. The truth could be disappointing and hurtful at that moment of time in your life, but it will set you free.
It is key to take your time, honor what you feel inside so you can respond instead of react – you are the only person who knows what is best for you. Coaching will help you connect to your true voice and will support you in trusting the process during this challenging period in your life.
Remember that every cloud, no matter how dark it seems right now, has a silver lining that will shine like never before.
Asma J.